Need to be sorted by November

My husband James is going to London for the weekend in November. I won't deny that I am not looking forward to it.

I worry I wont be 100% by then and I know I have to be as it will be just me and our two little monsters. So the race is on to kick anxiety's backside once more so my husband can enjoy his time away.

James is going to see his beloved Dallas Cowboys at Wembley. He is going with his brother.

I made the mistake of getting excited as I was asked if I wanted to go BUT turns out I am only a back up if his brother can't go.

Now this was not down to my husband or my brother in law it was someone else and NO it was not me.

This is one of the many things that has knocked my confidence and added to the list of things I am anxious about.

People have said "Why not all go and take the kids with you"

First of all my son is only 4 and daughter 2 and I would not take them to London that young. Lastly my son has school on the Monday which would be the day we travelled back.

I am happy for James as it's been a dream of his for so long to see Dallas play but I can't help but feel upset.

No doubt I am being selfish.